Children tend to suffer a great deal when families break up. They may feel as though their entire world has been turned asunder. In their own pain and upset over the divorce, the parents may lose sight of how their children are being affected. Yet as every parent knows, nothing is more important than safeguarding your children during a divorce.
Helping Your Kids
Divorce can be damaging to children. Most of this damage stems from the fact of the marital break-up. If, however, there is reason to believe they are likely to be in immediate physical harm, the court intervenes. But the rest of the time, the system sees them as just another detail to be dealt with and filed like paperwork.
Your child is your most important responsibility, and the most valuable "asset" you have in your life. One key to helping children deal with the trauma of divorce is to work to get along with the other parent as much as possible. This can be difficult, given the fact that divorce tends to be contentious, but the more parents can work with each other toward an amicable settlement, the easier the divorce will be on the children.
How Kids Cope
Evolution has made children extremely resilient. If you make some basic provisions for them, the majority will survive the divorce with no negative lasting effects. These provisions include excluding them from conflict, reassuring them, providing good examples, and monitoring their behavior. More than anything, they need to know that they are still going to be loved and cared for. In most cases they want to continue to have a relationship with both parents