Food and Your Divorce

I started thinking about what I was going to write this evening while preparing dinner. I found some lettuce and parmesan in the refrigerator, last night’s quinoa and grilled chicken, a can of kidney beans from the cupboard and voila! A delicious, healthy dinner enjoyed on the deck within Virginia’s narrow and precious two-week timeframe between cold winter and its buggy, humid counterpart.

So how does this play-by-play of my dinner help you in your divorce?

Hear me out.

I could have easily grabbed the blue-and-orange box of macaroni and cheese, boiled a pot of water and added some milk. To be perfectly honest, when I get home, exhausted, at the end of the day, a lot of the time I really don’t want to cook anything—including store-bought meals. (And that Thai restaurant a couple blocks away has the best pad thai on the planet, with no minimum delivery charge.)  I digress.

The point is that life is stressful already. Then, suddenly, your entire world is flipped upside down: you have become a single mom or dad, juggling your children’s school, sports, doctor’s appointments; an ex-spouse’s schedule, attitude and needs; your own tumultuous schedule, work, attitude and needs; court dates; and an iPhone that seems to have never stopped ringing since you and your spouse separated.

Going through your divorce is one of the most stressful and emotionally difficult times in your life. It is as if there isn’t a single moment that goes by where your head isn’t spinning with thoughts, worries, and confusion.

Through all of this, it is extremely easy to swing by your favorite fast-food drive-thru to squelch the hunger pangs and famished children in the backseat. But if you just give a couple more minutes to your recipe creativity or in planning before heading to the grocery store, you’ll realize that there really is time to make a lunch before running out the door.

Realize isn’t the right word, though. We all realize that making healthy choices is the best option.  The problem is often enough we are set in our ways in assuming that this “healthy choice” is a chore, another to-do on your ‘longer than the Dead Sea Scrolls’ to-do list.

It is better to say that you’ll appreciate that little extra time it takes to cut up some vegetables and broil a steak. Such nourishing food is not only a buffer in your schedule, but it is allowing you to take care of your body so you start feeling just a little better.

Simply the act of preparing food gives you breathing room where you can just relax for a moment.  After a few times, though, you’ll notice the pattern begets a snowball effect. You may be surprised that you find a chance to relax, however briefly, in other instances.

To eat. It is so simple, really, but we can so quickly take that for granted.

Try not to.

Try to gain back that consistency in good food, for you and for your children. Try to sit down for supper with your children. It will give you something to rely on, to help lose that chaotic, out-of-control feeling and put you back in control. 

That’s what we’re about here at Smith Strong PLC. Putting you back in control of your own life. Please give one of our Virginia Family Law Attorneys call anytime at (804) 325-1245 for legal advice you can rely on when you need it most. I


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